Nothing is inevitable. At every moment an intervention may come from a higher plane into the material one and alter the course of circumstances. But in this particular case there is a conflict between a very powerful mental construction founded on medical opinion and your faith in the divine Grace.
The power of this medical suggestion lies in the fact that it insinuates itself into the subconscious and acts on the body from there, undetected even by the conscious mind unless it is in the habit of scouring the subconscious with the vigilance of a detective.
So there we are—I cannot promise you that your faith in the Grace will be intense and unshakable enough to overcome the harmful effect of these medical suggestions; and I feel that I have no right to tell you, “It is nothing,” when everything in your material consciousness is crying out, “Danger!”
Rest assured that our help and our blessings are always with you.
24 March 1937
Certainly we will be happy to keep you here until June.
You are quite right in saying that these closed doors are an effect of the imagination. The will to pass through always has the power to open them, just as the certainty of victory brightens the path.
12 April 1937
Certainly when you are ready to return, after doing what you 188want to do for your son, you have only to inform us and we shall be happy to receive you.
Inner calm and peace and an ardent aspiration towards the Divine are the best preparation for receiving the help we can give, and you can be assured of receiving it from us.
29 April 1937
Sudden conversions are usually neither integral nor lasting; they are flashes of lightning which most often dissolve into smoke. Slow and steady effort and persistent striving for progress are more reliable: “piano ma sano”.fnSlowly but surely
And recalling what happened during your sleep is certainly not indispensable to the discovery of your soul.
I am glad you are feeling well.
Be sure that our help and protection are always with you.
12 May 1937
Do not let yourself be overwhelmed by the sense of vastness; bathe in it, rather, with joy and serenity. Were we confined inescapably within the four walls of our personal consciousness, that would indeed be sad and overwhelming—but the infinite is open to us; we have only to plunge into it.
29 May 1937
Sri Aurobindo has read your letter and agrees with me that it is difficult to make plans so far in advance, because circumstances are so unpredictable. One thing is settled, however: Sri Aurobindo has accepted you as a disciple—this is clearly shown by the fact that he has given you a new name. But being a disciple does not necessarily imply that one lives in the Ashram. In fact, there are more disciples living outside the Ashram than in it. 189Several conditions are needed to live in the Ashram, one of which is that one’s health should be good enough to allow one to conform to the Ashram discipline which does not provide any special arrangements for food, services and so on. Those arrangements can be made, for a limited period, for visitors; but for various reasons it is impossible to make them permanent. So when you are ready to return, let us know three or four months in advance so that we can see whether any practical arrangement can be made.
As for the readings, I think it would be better to spare yourself this strain for the time being. I think that the few private lessons you are giving are enough.
I am glad to know that you have recovered, and hope that your health will get better and better.
5 July 1937
I am sorry that you have been feeling sad these last few days. You should not have. The light should always bring with it the joy of new progress. Now I think that everything will be all right.
10 July 1937
Do not worry. You have not done anything wrong, either consciously or unconsciously. I was referring to a set of inner and outer circumstances, a set of circumstances which is the inevitable outcome of the preceding set, and so on. Only yogic power, the power of the divine Consciousness, can break this chain of consequences.
You must leave with your heart full of peace and your mind full of hope. You must leave with the assurance that our help and our force are going with you, and that our blessings are with you and will always be with you.
14 September 1937
190[In September 1937 the disciple went to France for six months, returning to the Ashram in March 1938.]
Do not fear; I can see beyond appearances and understand in silence or beyond words.
My arm will always be around you, to uphold and guide you.
Certainly you are my dear child, but I want her to be happy, not sorrowful, illumined, not ignorant.
My blessings are very affectionately with you.
13 June 1938
Since I did not see you at pranam, I was about to write and inquire whether the exhaustion you mentioned in yesterday’s letter was the reason. And just now I received your letter of this morning. What a pity that you had fever! But why? No apparent reason? In any case, I hope that it will soon be over.
Needless to say, our help, our force, our protection and our blessings are always with you; you must immerse yourself in them as in a soothing, healing bath. Let me add my tenderness.
17 July 1938
It is difficult for me to answer your question since I have no personal experience of utropine and its effects. But as a general rule I feel that when one goes to a doctor for treatment, one should do what he says. It is in cases of nephritis that utropine is supposed to be inadvisable. You could ask the doctor for an assurance that you are not suffering from nephritis—which seems very unlikely.
Our help and our blessings are always with you, affectionately.
20 July 1938
191This “Aspiration in the physical”fnThe Mother’s name for Flame-of-the-woods (ixora coccinea “Bandhuca”) with our blessings and all my love.
Do not let the doctor’s words disturb you. Illnesses are never serious unless we accept them as such. Besides, I expect to hear very soon that you are better.
24 July 1938
Here is a little “New Birth”.fnSweet Marjoram (oreganum majorana)
Indeed, what better use could one make of an illness than to take the opportunity to go deep within oneself and awaken, take birth into a new consciousness, more luminous and more true.
Our help and our blessings are always with you, affectionately.
28 July 1938
Sri Aurobindo and I think it would be wiser for you to wait another week before coming to pranam. And the meditation twice a day will be possible only when you no longer feel any weakness at all, because at the moment there are many people and the physical atmosphere is rather heavy to breathe.
So we ask you to be patient a little longer, to allow your material strength time to return. Our help and protection are with you for that.
Very affectionately.
26 August 1938
I do not recall mentioning any passages in which Sri Aurobindo prophesies present events. I referred to certain pages in which Sri Aurobindo gives a very brief glimpse of his own Work at present 192on earth, his Work of divinising matter, and I told you that it is hinted at in one of the chapters of “Thoughts and Glimpses”.
20 September 1938
Do not worry; you told me long ago—in silence—what you “confessed” to me this evening. And I have always given you the same answer: do not worry; not all gifts need to be material ones—and self-giving is surely the best gift of all.
29 September 1938
These spontaneous reflex actions reveal the subconscious. By tracking down these spontaneous impulses one can gradually clear a path into the virgin forest of the subconscient and bring the Light into it.
Do not worry, and above all do not feel sad! On the 12th the dose was probably a little too strong and, as a result, a little difficult to digest. If you can simply remain quiet, very quiet, everything will settle down. Then the Light will reappear, brighter and more beautiful than ever.
Have no fear—nothing has the power to take you away from me, for I am always with you—in you.
Affectionately.
13 November 1938
Mother,
I have not taken the medicine advised by Dr. X, thinking that since I would be writing to you, I would not do anything without you. Should I write to Dr. Y in Paris and ask his opinion?
Yes, it would be better not to take anything without consulting your doctor in Paris.
193No, not necessary; as few doctors as possible, as few medicines as possible!!
Oh no, no drugs! The more drugs you take, the more you undermine your body’s natural resistance.
To relieve tension, ten minutes of real calm, inner and outer, are more effective than all the remedies in the world. In silence lies the most effective help.
With our blessings.
30 January 1939
To tell the truth, I think the doctor is right: your complaint is nervous. I mean that it is a functional disorder, not an organic one. The fact that you have a headache does not contradict this, for one can have a nervous headache and suffer very much from it. In any case, nervous or not, it is quite clear that if you were in constant contact with the Divine you would be perfectly all right.
Our blessings are always with you.
Very affectionately.
9 February 1939
It would be so nice not to take any injections! Wouldn’t it?
As for the other things, do not worry. The divine Grace is behind everything, even shortcomings, and with Its help there is 194nothing that cannot be made an opportunity for progress.
Our blessings are always with you.
23 March 1939
How you torment yourself—about nothing! I knew perfectly well that you were going to dine with the banker, and I found nothing wrong with that, any more than with your little musical gatherings or anything else of that kind. I have always considered that you were free to see whom you like and go where you please. Only once did I give you some advice about this, but that was simply a piece of advice, nothing more, and referred to a single, very precise case.
I hasten to send you this note in the hope that it will bring you the peace and tranquillity I wish for you always.
My blessings are with you unceasingly.
3 May 1939
My dear little X,
If you want my true way of seeing things, I must tell you that taking a good dose of faith and confidence in the Divine Grace is better than all the pills and injections in the world.
With my blessings. I am always with you.
7 May 1939
My poor little X,
I am truly very sorry to have to disappoint you, but the interview you want certainly cannot take place until the war is over.
Besides, for inner growth, I do not believe that words are necessary. In silence all our help is there at its most powerful.
With love and blessings.
6 September 1939
195My little X,
It is impossible to meditate with another person without receiving something of the vibrations emanating from him, just as one cannot enter a place without breathing the air that is there.
When someone has a harmful atmosphere and a bad influence (I warned you of this), one must be careful, while meditating, not to put oneself into a state of receptivity with that atmosphere!
It is not wrong, but it is an act of ignorance. And needless to say, it cannot prevent you from being my little X or stop my arms from surrounding and protecting you.
19 September 1939
Why do you want to break your silence? Silence is the door to all true spiritual realisations.
And I am with you always. Draw on my force in the silence; it will never fail you.
Our blessings.
23 December 1939
My dear little X,
When the demon of jealousy whispers a suggestion in your ear, you must be very careful not to listen to it.
When the war broke out, I told you that until it was over I would not give any interviews to sadhaks. I am doing what I said. All the regular interviews have been stopped. Occasionally, not always, I see a visitor before he leaves. Other than that, in all these months I have made only two or three exceptions, including one for you about your affairs. If someone told you otherwise, why believe him? You must quickly chase these shadows far away from you and live constantly in the serenity of an unshakable trust.
196I am always with you. If you listen carefully, you will hear my answers to your questions. When all grows silent and calm within you, you will feel my presence concretely, and no help is more real or more effective than that.
With my deepest affection and our blessings always.
4 March 1940
My dear little X,
I agree upon the 22nd—probably it will be about 5:30 at the top of the stairs—but in these days of extreme instability it is difficult to make arrangements so far ahead. We must live from day to day our whole consciousness intent on the only luminous horizon: that of the divine Realisation.
Our blessings are with you, as well as my love.
5 July 1940
My dear little X,
Dryness is ordinarily the sign of too great a concern with oneself (whether material or spiritual) and a consequent narrowing of the consciousness, which is no longer sufficiently in communion with the divine forces.
The remedy: a completer self-giving to the Divine.
With my blessings and all my love.
8 December 1940
My dear little X,
Do not worry; I only meant that you are not yet completely free from social ties—but that will surely come as the flame of aspiration towards the Divine burns more and more ardently in you.
With my blessings and all my love.
16 January 1941