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37

The Mother

Since the beginning of the earth, wherever and whenever there was the possibility of manifesting a ray of the Consciousness, I was there.

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That which is speaking to you now, is a faithful servant of the Divine. From all time, since the beginning of the earth, as a faithful servant of the Divine, it has spoken in the name of its Master. And as long as earth and men exist, it will be there in a body to preach the divine word.

So, wherever I am asked to speak, I do my best, as a servant of the Divine.

But to speak in the name of a particular doctrine or of a man, however great he may be, that I cannot do!

The Eternal Transcendent forbids me.

1912

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38

Myself and My Creed

I belong to no nation, no civilisation, no society, no race, but to the Divine.

I obey no master, no ruler, no law, no social convention, but the Divine.

To Him I have surrendered all, will, life, self; for Him I am ready to give all my blood, drop by drop, if such is His Will, with complete joy; and nothing in His service can be sacrifice, for all is perfect delight.

Japan, February 1920

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39

How I Became Conscious of My Mission

When and how did I become conscious of a mission which I was to fulfil on earth? And when and how I met Sri Aurobindo?

These two questions you have asked me and I promised a short reply.

For the knowledge of the mission, it is difficult to say when it came to me. It is as though I were born with it, and following the growth of the mind and brain, the precision and completeness of this consciousness grew also.

Between 11 and 13 a series of psychic and spiritual experiences revealed to me not only the existence of God but man’s possibility of uniting with Him, of realising Him integrally in consciousness and action, of manifesting Him upon earth in a life divine. This, along with a practical discipline for its fulfilment, was given to me during my body’s sleep by several teachers, some of whom I met afterwards on the physical plane.

Later on, as the interior and exterior development proceeded, the spiritual and psychic relation with one of these beings became more and more clear and frequent; and although I knew little of the Indian philosophies and religions at that time I was led to call him Krishna, and henceforth I was aware that it was with him (whom I knew I should meet on earth one day) that the divine work was to be done.

In the year 1910 my husband came alone to Pondicherry where, under very interesting and peculiar circumstances, he made the acquaintance of Sri Aurobindo. Since then we both strongly wished to return to India—the country which I had always cherished as my true mother-country. And in 1914 this joy was granted to us.

As soon as I saw Sri Aurobindo I recognised in him the well-known being whom I used to call Krishna.… And this is enough to explain why I am fully convinced that my place and my work are near him, in India.

Pondicherry, 1920

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40

O, my Lord, my Lord!
What you want of me, let me be.
What you want me to do, let me do.

20 June 1931

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My Lord, I will not try to escape from the work Thou hast given me. Wherever Thou placest my consciousness, it will remain without any attempt to rise to the blissful heights. Even if Thou willest it to be in the mud of the most material nature, it will stay there peaceful and at rest. But wherever it is, it cannot but be without aspiring towards Thee, opening to Thy influence and calling Thee down into itself as the sole reality of its existence.

7 March 1932

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With what ardour the consciousness aspires to escape from the prison of material vibrations and soar towards Thee, Lord, in the immaculate heights!

But flight is impossible… it is against Thy Will. The consciousness must remain caught in the mud of this obscure and ignorant nature. That is all right; the joy of being and doing what Thou wantest surpasses all other joys, even the most sublime.

But the consciousness cries: “I want Thee, I want Thee; without Thee I am nothing, I do not even exist!” And the vibration of the call is so strong that even this heavy Matter is shaken by it. “I want Thee, I want Thee! Since Thou dost not permit me to spring towards Thee, leaving all behind to be with Thee, I shall call Thee from here; and I shall beseech Thee so very much that Thou wilt come down to infuse Thyself into a world that has finally awakened to the absolute need of Thy Presence.” And the vibration of this invocation was so intense that through the dark and amorphous mass passed the first quiver announcing the approach of the Beloved.

8 March 1932

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41

O my God, Thou hast told me: “Plunge into Matter and identify thyself with it: it is there that I would manifest.”

And Thy will has been done—but Matter has ignored the gift and persists in wanting to seek in obscure and false activities and relations a satisfaction which it cannot find there.

And yet Thou hast promised me the Victory…

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O Lord, awaken my entire being that it may be for Thee the needed instrument, the perfect servant.

27 March 1936

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What I want to bring about in the material world, upon the earth.

1. Perfect Consciousness.

2. Integral Knowledge, omniscience.

3. Power invincible, irresistible, ineluctable; omnipotence.

4. Health, perfect, constant, unshakable; perpetually renewed energy.

5. Eternal youth, constant growth, uninterrupted progress.

6. Perfect beauty, complex and total harmony.

7. Inexhaustible unparalleled riches, control over all the wealth of this world.

8. The gift of healing and giving happiness.

9. Immunity from all accidents, invulnerability against all adverse attacks.

10. Perfect power of expression in all fields and all activities.

11. The gift of tongues, the power of making oneself understood perfectly by all.

12. And all else necessary for the accomplishment of Thy work.

23 October 1937

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42

I wish

1. personally to be eternally the perfect expression of the Supreme Divine.

2. that the supramental victory, manifestation and transformation should take place at once.

3. that all suffering should disappear for ever from the worlds present and future.